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Do narcissist kids gaslight their parents?

Yes some narcissistic kids do gaslight their parents to the point of emotional destabilisation thus causing doubt and confusion in their parents and in other members of the family I.e. siblings.


This can happen whether the parents are young or old. All too often the parents don't notice until the pattern has become entrenched. You must set boundaries when you start to see this behaviour at the earliest stage possible.

Notice if you explain/justify yourself to your child too much because you are looking for their approval, or if you do not carry out the consequences promised for their unacceptable behaviour, or you do not allow yourself privacy etc. These examples cause the breaking down of boundaries.

If your child has difficulty following rules do check for neurodifference issues such as Aspergers or ADHD, to get them the support they might need.

If the parents are separated coercive controlling parents can try to cause parental alienation by causing one parent to play one child against the another parent, gaslighting can be use by both the parent and the child to achieve this.

Sadly though it generally happens as the parents age.

Luckily in my experience there is often one child that sees what is going on and they try their best to help. But it's often a difficult battle which is not often proven or won, as this narcissistic behaviour is covert. Particularly if the parents due to age can be easily manipulated.

Sadly the end game is generally ‘money’ often through the efforts to control the family business or the family property".

The good news is that if the parents are young and can see what is happening and have the ability to work together as a solid team they can take their power back.

If they find this stage difficult therapeutic support can be sought from a therapist who understands the dynamics of coercive control.

Through this process they can learn the skills to enable them deal with the offending children thus saving their own health, the health of the family and that of the business if one exists.

This takes courage however it's worth it for all concerned and particularly for future generations.


For more information about the subjects covered in this blog, contact Margaret Parkes - phone: 086 832 0422 email: mparkestherapy@gmail.com

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