with a narcissistic family members or child?
Firstly expect them to respond with surprise anger and disgust because they no longer have control over you. This they will NOT like. Hopefully you are now in a place where u do not need the approval of your family or children. If not please get therapeutic support to bring you to this place.
It's important that you stay calm, but do not react to the likely gaslighting that might come your way. Please google Lisa A Romano's short gaslighting podcast for support.
Most likely some will try to contact you or play the victim card or use their flying monkeys to pull on your heart strings I.e. my client this week was about to give in to her manipulative father who tried to bring her back into the abusive family “ but your mum is very lonely without you" she had always been her mums caretaker, taking the fathers responsibilities as a husband off his shoulders causing her to neglect herself, her child and her husband. It's essential to stay strong at this point and remain boundaried and just say something simple like “no unfortunately I am not available this weekend”.
They will understandably be confused because you are breaking the habits of a life time, and by the way do not expect them to ever understand where you are coming from or why you are doing this. They just never will. You are WASTING your energy and it's disempowering. You must let go of their response.
This is why it's important to be consistent or you will cause more confusion for all. You are setting new rules of engagement with your family or children for a reason.
You could be threatened to be excluded from your inheritance. You cannot let these or any other threats control you. This is their manipulation continuing. You have chosen this change for a reason ‘YOUR sanity’. Good luck moving forward.
For more information about the subjects covered in this blog, contact Margaret Parkes - phone: 086 832 0422 email: mparkestherapy@gmail.com
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